KERRY Needham boarded a flight back to Greece convinced she’d finally found her long lost son Ben – who vanished as a toddler – alive and well.
This man was the right age and childhood photos showed he looked the spitting image of the missing tot, and completely different to his own family, but what happened next would leave both traumatised.
DNA tests would ultimately prove unequivocally that the man, who we’re referring to as Alexis – from northern Greece – was not missing Ben, and initially Kerry struggled to accept it, convinced someone had “tampered” with the samples.
She told The Sun: “We had a connection, it was strange. He felt like he was Ben, and I was certain – but he just wasn’t and it tore me apart.”
The pair have remained close, and still speak over social media, with Kerry, now 53, saying she would be “proud” if he’d turned out to be her son.
But, such was the trauma of that episode, now over 10 years later, she says: “I can’t put myself through that again.”
It comes as she awaits DNA testing on another man in the US who also believes he could be Ben.
Kerry, now living in Turkey, revealed to The Sun in January the American stranger’s partner had emailed her saying he believed he could be the missing Brit.
She’s refusing to let herself get carried away, having seen scores of people come forward over the years – including three last year alone.
The mum-of-two, originally from Sheffield, who was just 19 when Ben disappeared, said while the limbo is hard, getting her hopes up isn’t worth it.
“I don’t anymore, it’s too painful,” Kerry explained. “Without sounding callous, these days it’s more like an elimination process.”
But of the dozens of people who have come forward, Kerry said the only one who she was convinced about was Alexis – the Greek man – in 2015.
“It absolutely devastated me,” she explained. “We had four separate DNA tests because I just couldn’t believe it was not Ben.
“He was the same as well, and it tore me apart.”
That was the last time she allowed herself to get her hopes up.
“I had to go ‘you can’t do this to yourself anymore… you can’t let your emotions run away with you’.”
Timeline of the Ben Needham missing person case
Here we take a look at the search for missing Ben:
- July 24 1991: Ben Needham vanishes while playing near the grounds of a farmhouse in the Iraklis region of Kos, which his family are renovating. His mother, Kerry Needham, and grandparents raise the alarm with local police and conduct a full search of the area.
- July 26 1991: Eyewitness reports claim a boy matching Ben’s description was found at the local airport on the day he disappeared. That boy has never been traced.
- September 1991: The Needham family return to England but vow to continue the search.
- June 2003: The Metropolitan Police issue an image of what Ben might look like at age 12-14 years old.
- 2004: An anonymous businessman offers a reward of £500,000 for information leading to Ben’s safe return.
- October 2010: Another public appeal is made by Ben’s mother in the run-up to what would be his 21st birthday.
- May 2011: The BBC airs a programme called Missing 2011, which includes a piece on Ben’s story and the campaign to find him.
- September 2011: Greek police on Kos officially re-open the case and grant the family a face-to-face meeting with the island’s prosecutor.
- October 2012: South Yorkshire Police in Kos begin digging up mounds around the property where Ben went missing to look for his remains.
- December 2013: Ben’s mother accuses then-Prime Minister David Cameron of not giving her case the same backing as he gave the parents of Madeline McCann. It comes as a dossier is produced containing reports from eight witnesses, none of who know each other, who all saw a boy possibly matching Ben’s description with the same Greek family.
- December 2014: Lawyers representing Ben’s family say they may take legal action to try to force the Government to make a decision about funding a new police investigation.
- January 2015: The Home Office agrees to fund a team of British detectives to help search for the toddler.
- March/April 2015: Three generations of Ben Needham’s family travel to Greece to follow up a “strong” lead that a man living there believes he may be the missing Brit due to having no photographs of himself under the age of two and no knowledge of where he was born. The man is later ruled out.
- May 2015: Ben’s family make a fresh appeal on Greek television for information regarding the disappearance.
- May 2016: The Sun reveals how members of the police operation went on an eight-hour booze-up in Kos during the latest stage of the investigation.
- September 2016: Ben’s family are told to “prepare for the worst” by detectives leading the investigation, amid the belief the 21-month-old was crushed to death by a digger – the driver of which died in 2015. It comes as police arrive in Kos to begin excavation work in the belief the boy’s remains may be buried near the farmhouse.
- October 15, 2016: On the penultimate day of a three week search at two locations – Site 1, near the farmhouse, and Site 2, a landfill site – an item which is believed to have belonged to Ben is discovered.
- October 16, 2016: After digging up more than 800 tonnes of soil, the excavation work comes to an end with any items of interest sent back to the UK for forensic analysis.
- October 17, 2016: South Yorkshire Police DI Jon Cousins announces the discovery of an item that backs up their theory Ben died following an accident near the farmhouse on the day he disappeared.
- July 24, 2017: It emerges blood was found on a sandal and toy car belonging to Ben. The sandal was found in 2012 at the site where Konstantinos “Dino” Barkas was operating a digger, while the car was discovered in 2016 at another spot. No further information emerged. Ben’s mum makes another heartbreaking appeal for information.
- November 28, 2018: Forensic experts say the toy car found in the Kos dig does not belong to Ben.
- July 25, 2019: Ben’s mum, Kerry Needham, calls on the person with a “secret” about her missing toddler to come forward, saying it was “never too late to do the right thing”.
- July 2021: Police probe the claims of three witnesses that a blonde boy found on a beach wearing a white t-shirt, “crying desperately” and speaking English 587 miles away in Corfu could’ve been the youngster.
Alexis – who Kerry has never identified – came from a wealthy family with gypsy heritage.
“They were all dark skinned and dark eyed, and he was blonde and blue eyed,” she explained.
A work colleague of his had contacted Kerry on his behalf through her Help Find Ben Needham page on Facebook.
“He really didn’t want his family to find out he’d gone down the road of thinking he’d been stolen – we had to keep it low profile for his sake,” she explained.
After speaking back and forth, and seeing photos of him as a child and now, all of which seemed to match the different age progressions created over the years, Kerry asked him to send his toothbrush in the post for testing.
She gave it to South Yorkshire Police, who have been running the search on the UK side since Ben vanished in 1991, but it was quickly quashed.
“It came back negative and I wasn’t satisfied with that,” she said. “I just couldn’t believe it.”
Kerry asked if Alexis had packed the toothbrush himself, or if anyone else could have tampered with it – paranoid something had happened to nullify the result.
After admitting he’d given it to his work colleague to package, Kerry made arrangements to meet him in Greece.
“I said we need to do this face to face,” she explained.
Kerry and her mum Christine then flew out to meet Alexis.
“I know it sounds really strange, it was like I’d found him,” she explained. “He felt the same.”
Alexis didn’t speak English, and they communicated with a translator, as well as a friend of friend of Kerry’s.
“The connection was just unreal – he was Ben,” she continued.
They then had a series of private blood tests done, and even flew Kerry’s daughter Leighanna over to Greece to attempt a sibling DNA match.
“We waited about three weeks for the results,” she explained.
During that time, the Needhams remained in the area and Kerry met up with Alexis multiple times.
“He was just amazing,” Kerry said. “He thought he was Ben. The likeness between myself and him and my daughter and him was strong, and we had a connection.”
But again there was disappointment, with Kerry admitting it was “soul destroying for both of us”.
Still not convinced, the mum took another two swab samples from Alexis’ mouth and took them back to South Yorkshire Police, but again the results were negative.
Kerry said: “I had to then accept that it wasn’t him. It was really upsetting, and from then I can’t do that anymore.
“I can’t get close enough and I can’t let my emotions run away with me or even try and build up some kind of relationship with the person for their sake as well as mine.”
She added: “It’s a painful process for both parties.”
But even now, despite all the alleged sightings and possible candidates coming forward, she says Alexis is the only person who’s had her convinced.
“I’ve never had that feeling apart from that one,” Kerry said.
The pair have even remained in touch, and he once helped follow up a possible lead in his local area in the years since.
“There’s no other person that I’ve had that connection with or kept in contact with. Never,” said Kerry.
“It’s something I can’t explain. He was absolutely adorable, I would’ve been so proud if he’d have been Ben.
“I’m so proud of him for what he’s achieved in his life and the person he is.
“He’s just a really lovely man. I’ll hold him close to my heart for the rest of my life.”
Fast forward to today, however, and despite her best efforts, Kerry says in her “down moments”, as she waits for the results of the latest match – the man in the US, “I think please God, let it be him”.
She said: “He knows he’s adopted, at least, and he just wants to find out who he is.”
She almost had to put the mystery American out of her mind completely when, after forwarding his correspondence to police, she lost contact for several weeks.
“We were starting to think it was a hoax,” Kerry admitted this week. “Not in a bad way, but you do get people coming forward claiming to be Ben – they tell you all this information and it turns out not to be true.
“We were kind of thinking this is going to be another one of those.”
But, miraculously, the man’s girlfriend got back in touch last week.
“The girlfriend emailed back apologising, and gave an explanation as to why she’s not been in touch,” said Kerry.
“They still wanted to go ahead with the DNA test, and explained a few things about his adoption and having problems getting hold of his birth certificate and some other things, which does sound distressing.”
Kerry passed the message back to South Yorkshire Police – and now a DNA sample will be taken and the process will have to go through Interpol.
Kerry is in the dark as to when the result might come back – the last time she went through this was in 2024, when yet another man, this time from Denmark, came forward for testing, which ultimately also ended in disappointment.
“I know it’s going to be a slow process,” explained Kerry. “Even with the last one in Denmark, that one took about six or seven weeks, and that was only Europe, so I have no idea.
“Anything going via Interpol takes a long time.”
Help find Ben
Earlier this month, Kerry posted a plea on Facebook asking for donations to help continue funding the search for Ben.
She said: “For nearly 35 years, my family and I have carried the weight of searching for Ben.
“Almost every step of this journey has been funded by us, with occasional kindness from members of the public who chose to stand beside us.
“Every day without answers has been a day of wondering, hoping, and refusing to give up on my boy.
“With your help and any further donations, I can keep going. I can keep following the leads that are still out there — the ones that might finally tell us what truly happened to Ben.
“We are also preparing to take Ben’s case to a higher level, hoping it will finally move forward and bring the truth we have been waiting decades to hear.
“No donation is ever too small. Every bit of support helps us continue this search, and every message of love and encouragement gives me strength on the days when this heartbreak feels impossible to carry.
“Thank you for still caring. Thank you for remembering Ben. It means more to me than words can ever fully express to see how many people still hold him in their hearts, and still stand with me after all these years.
“From the bottom of my heart, thank you for your love, strength, and support.
“It truly means the world to me.”
Referring to the latest possible match, who she says was adopted as a baby in the US, she said: “He could be Ben, I try to be as supportive as I can for anyone in that position, who comes forward.
“I’ve been through this lots and lots of times, and you have to remember the person in question hasn’t.”
Kerry said to even be coming to the point where someone is contacting her believing they could be Ben “must be really traumatic for them”.
“I’ve been searching for Ben for all these years, but it must be really really hard for them,” she said.
“I tend to put my effort into trying to support them, rather than focusing on myself because it’s devastating when it’s not turned out,” she continued.
“I keep a very open mind and keep very level headed about it. I keep myself as busy as I possibly can be and just be there for that person.”
Despite theories indicating Ben was killed, including by a digger working near the farmhouse he was last seen, Kerry is convinced he’s still alive.
Multiple excavations have been done in the area over the years, though nothing has ever been found to confirm Ben died.
Kerry’s research has shown there were traffickers snatching children from the streets of Greece, particularly those with western looks, into the 90s, and many were later adopted in the US.
She said: “There’s no physical or forensic evidence to back up that theory [that he died].
“In my mind, Ben is a missing person and I’ll do what I can to find him.”
Source: https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/38550345/ben-needhams-mum-dna/
